An ideal doctrine for Husband and Wife - for an everlasting happiness!

AN IDEAL DOCTRINE FOR HUSBAND AND WIFE - FOR AN EVERLASTING HAPPINESS!

1. INTRODUCTION

Recently, in my sister's wedding, finding me as unmarried (a scapegoat) many elders talked to me and enquired about my thoughts on marriage, my dream wife and her characteristics and so on. They wanted to know all these to search for matching alliances for me. I couldn't elaborate my thoughts due to time and other constraints, and talked only in headlines.

However, later when i reflected in myself all those sequences, I thought of penning down my views of Vedic marriage system and about the ideal qualities of a husband and wife. Hence this article!

Moreover, It is said that every man carries three debts on him to be disbursed. They are - 1. Deva RuNam (Debt to Gods), 2. Rishi-RuNam (Debt to Rishis), and 3 Pitru-RuNam (Debt to Pitris/departed ancestors). Out of these a man can payback only the 2nd debt without needing a wife. That is by studying the scriptures handed over by the great Rishis of our lineage and by teaching the same (that is, transferring the knowledge to keep it rolling), to our descendants or disciples, one can disburse the debt to Rishis. This can be completed even by being a Brahmachari or a Sanyasi. It doesn't require a wife.

However, the remaining two viz. debt to Gods and debt to departed ancestors cannot be disbursed without the company of a wife. Debt to Gods can be paid off by doing Yajnas (sacrifices) and one gets an eligibility to do Yajna only if his wife sits besides him. With yajnas we offer Havis (food) to Gods. Gods consume them and get pleased and then they pour timely rains on earth. With timely seasonal changes earth produces good crops, and people remain healthy and entire planet remains blissful. For all this to happen, only a Gruhastha (householder) is eligible to do Yajnas.

Similarly, the debt to Pitris (ancestors) can be paid by begetting a son and keeping the race continuing. For begetting a so one needs to get into Gruhasthashrama and beget a son upon his wedded wife righteously. So, without a wife a man cannot repay the debt to his ancestors. Therefore, it becomes mandatory for a man to sail through the Ashrama called "Gruhasthashrama".

Not only this. Gruhasthashrama is the greatest of all other Ashramas because the other Ashramas depend on Gruhasthas for food. Food keeps all beings alive and nourishes them. Brahmacharis, Vanaprasthas, and Sanyasis do not cook food for themselves, they seek food from the house of a householder only. Therefore Gruhastha is the pillar on whom all other ashramas lean and take rest!

Keeping in mind the glory of Gruhasthashrama every man should seek to wed a virtuous, learned, and wise wife, because she is the support of the order of gruhastha mode of life.

2. ATTRIBUTES OF AN IDEAL HUSBAND and WIFE

A husband and wife should be like that of Sita and Rama. Often when you say this, many ignorant people dislike this correlation saying, "What happiness did they ever gain in their life? Their life was full of pain alone". But their such words need to be known only as arising out of ignorance. Sita-Rama are always cited as an ideal couple because of their inseparable nature even during their separation!

When Ravana kidnaped Sita; Rama and Sita got physically separated from each other. However, Rama always remained in the thoughts of Sita as can be seen throughout Aranya kanda, to Sundara Kanda. Likewise Sita emaciated herself without taking even a morsel of food but always remained merged in the thoughts of her lord viz. Rama! They both remained outwardly in two locations separated bodily from each other, but by their heart and soul, they always were one and united! I cannot cite references from Ramayana to support their mutual love because entire Ramayana itself is a testimony. How may verses I can quote?

Such a mutual love and affection need to exist between a couple in my opinion. Secondly, Sita Rama are ideal couple because of their fidelity for each other which remained undamaged throughout their lifetime. ShurpaNakha a demoness who was capable of assuming any beautiful form at will, approached Rama lustfully and asked him to accept her. Since she could change her looks at will and could appear in multiple beautiful forms, that would have been a jack pot for Rama to enjoy pleasures with her daily. However, he didn't abandon Sita. That was his unbroken faithfulness towards his consort. Similarly, Sita was amorously approached by the wretch Ravana many a times. He offered her all the glories and proposed her to be his queen and share his bed. Ravana was that terrible monster whom even the three worlds were afraid of. None among the deities were able to conquer him. So, Sita could have easily taken his hand and abandoned a loner Rama who had giver her 14 years of exile soon after marriage. However, she didn't even think of such options. She always kept herself immersed in the thoughts of her Rama alone. That is the fidelity that makes her story never fade away even after eons and eons!

In my opinion, every men and women should try to emulate the footsteps of Sita and Rama. It's difficult for sure since as Bhagawad Gita says - "No doubt it is difficult to control the mind O Arjuna, however, with practice and dispassion, one can conquer the mind!".

So, let's give it a try! 

3. A GOOD WIFE CAN BESTOW FOUR PURUSHARTHAS ON HER HUSBAND

3.1 THE FOUR PURUSHARTHAS

Our Vedas declare that every human being should pursue four purusharthas (pursuits / goals) viz. Dharma (Righteousness as taught by Vedas and scriptures), Artha (materialistic pursuits like earning wealth, house, wife, children, health, name, fame etc.), Kama (all desires and wishes), Moksha (liberation by self-realization). While Moksha is the highest of all the Purusharthas, one cannot escape the prior three to pursue the last one - Moksha.
Especially, one who is in Gruhasthashrama (wedded life), for such a being, scriptures mandate him to pursue all the four of them. Now, a question may arise - "Should one purse all four of them independently or there is any dependency among them?", the answer is - "Yes, all four are interdependent where, 'Dharma', acts as the foundation for the rest three". Here is how Dharma gives support for all the three:

#. Artha (earning wealth) -> when pursued independent of the guidelines laid down by Dharma (righteousness), leads us to earn wealth, but accrues sin along with it. Getting a son is also a wealth for the parents because that adds to their family and continues the race. But then this son has to be begotten on one's own wedded wife only. Then this Artha becomes supported by Dharma. Possessing lands, Homes, Cattle, Vehicles and everything which comes under Artha must be earned righteously. Hence Dharma always remains inseparably entangled with Artha. Similarly, one can become famous by earning good name and can equally become famous (notorious) by earning a bad name, however earning the former type is suggested by scriptures and that can be earned only with the support of Dharma. Therefore we can see very clearly that Artha is dependent on Dharma.
#. Kama (desires, wishes,) -> Kama doesn't always mean lust, it has a wide spectrum which encompasses all sorts of desires, and wishes. Desire to have a own house is 'Kama', and possessing that becomes Artha. For fulfilling that desire one needs to spend the righteously earned and hard-earned funds (which symbolize Dharma) and posses a house (which becomes Artha) and not by forcefully occupying other’s lands. Even the carnal desires which arise from lust, should be obtained from one's own wedded wife alone. Hence Kama (in all sense) needs to be leaning on Dharma always.
#. Moksha (liberation) -> Moksha is obtained through self-knowledge. For self-knowledge to dawn, chitta-shuddhi is mandatory. For chitta to get purified, good and virtuous deeds, austerities, truthfulness, non-violence, steadiness of mind, control of senses, knowledge of scriptures (as taught by one's preceptor), and god's grace is required. All these required ingredients shower on us only when one follows the path of Dharma (righteousness).

3.2 A DISCERNING AND WISE WIFE CAN BIND THE FOUR PURUSHARTHAS IN HARMONY

We have seen in above analysis that all the four pursuits viz. Dharma, Artha, Kama, Moksha are mutually dependent. However, that is easy only at a theoretical level. It is easier said than done, in reality! Practically, all the four pursuits are mutually contradicting and opposing each other in one's real life. One may wonder, how! Here is the answer:

#. Artha:- One who follows Dharma seriously, usually remains poor and suffers hardships throughout his life. People who have huge real estates and multiple houses on their name, have not all obtained them by their righteously earned money. many people use their power to forcefully capture week and illiterate people's lands and build their estates over them. They have earned Artha but not at the expense of Dharma. People who earn high positions, not always ascend based on their true skills. Many attain higher seats by favouritism, by cunning nature and by climbing on the shoulders of the weaker subordinates. Therefore again, such high achievements are not always founded upon Dharma (righteousness).
#. Kama:- Practically not everyone binds their desires with righteousness and seeks to fulfil them. Today all companies allow one to get reimbursement for medical expenses, and it's not unknown to us how many of the employees use that facility righteously. The desire to make quick money (for free) makes them apply fake medical bills to get the full allowance of whatever the company provides. So, where is the desire (Kama) for Artha (wealth) fulfilled righteously here? Further, taking Kama as lust also we can understand that not everyone walks the path of Sri Rama and Sita in today's world. Infidelity is increasing day by day. So, dharma and Kama are not going hand in hand nowadays.

Now the question arises, - Who can regulate all these four purusharthas and bring them into harmony? Answer is - A discerning and wise wife! If you said, "Who says, so?", the answer is - the illustrious King, the Dharmaraja Yudhishthira says so, in the following conversation between him and Yaksha from Mahabharata's Vana Parva.

Yaksha asks a very touch question to Yudhishthira as follows:

यक्ष उवाच
धर्ममर्थस्च कामस्च् परस्पर विरोधिनः।
एषाम् नित्य्विरुद्धानां कथमेकत्र सङ्गमः॥ (MBH Vana Parva Chapter 297)
"The Yaksha asked,--'Virtue, profit, and desire are opposed to one another. How could things thus antagonistic to one another exist together?"

Explanation:

The yaksha is making a query here: - "virtue, wealth and desire are three mutually conflicting factors in human life. In pursuing virtue on can face a situation where his wealth is depleted and his personal desires are challenged to their detriment often. The query is as to how these three can be balanced to have a good life".

Yudhistira has a very learned answer

युधिष्ठिर उवाच
यदा धर्मस्च भार्या च परस्परवशानुगौ।
तदा धर्मार्थकामानं त्रयाणामपि सङ्गमः॥ (MBH Vana Parva Chapter 297)
"Yudhishthira answered,--'When a wife and virtue agree with each other, then all the three thou hast mentioned may exist together'."

Explanation:

Yudhishthira replies: The day to day good deeds of a man are mostly under the silent guidance of his wife. Besides the domestic finance cannot be managed without the active support of the good wife..And for an honest man all his desires are fulfilled and enjoyed in the happiness of his wife. Thus if one man has a discerning and wise lady as his wife..there will be absolute control of all his varied aspects of life.

1. A wise wife when remains adherent of Dharma (virtue / righteousness), she controls the incoming/outgoing funds righteously. Even if husband slips from Dharma she says "stop!" and corrects him and keeps a check on him. This is how she helps his Artha remain in sync with Dharma
2. She when clings firmly to Dharma she also regulates the Kama of her husband in all ways, right from checking the desire for earning black-money to even satiating all other desires and pleasures of flesh. Thereby she prevents her husband from attaining the sin of "para stree vaancha dosha" as well. Hence a good wife is an indispensable element of a happy and righteous householder (gruhastha) life.
3. Moksha is an achievement of individual effort. One cannot bestow Moksha on anyone. However, a good wife who regulates Dharma and makes it pervade through other two pursuits of her husband indirectly makes her husband free from all evils and sins. Thereby helps her husband gain purity of mind (chitta shuddhi) easily and sooner. Then with his own efforts towards realization, he can attain self-knowledge and Moksha. So, indirectly, a good wife becomes the catalyst in accelerating the Husband's efforts towards Moksha.

Conclusion: - From this it is quite clear that a good wife can regulate Dharma, Artha and Kama and bring them in harmony and help her husband in his three spiritual pursuits directly and in fourth (Moksha) indirectly. Therefore there cannot be any better companion that a good wife for a man!

4. INDEPENDENCE OR INTER-DEPENDENCE ?

Today 'independence' has become a buzz-word. Today's people are so much fascinated by that word that they apply it in every field, and sadly even in the institution called marriage! Marriage (Vivaaham) is an institution designed for inter-dependence and not for independence  A husband has to look at his wife for seeking love, affection, and care and a wife has to seek love and protection from her husband. No doubt, they need to have their 'freewill' in expressing themselves, their feelings, wishes etc., , but that freewill cannot be confused with 'independence'.

Unfortunately, today's couples are becoming arrogant, egoistic, proud and haughty in their behaviour towards each other in the name of independence  Most of the times such cases end up in losing mutual affection and finally lands up in divorce - which is a bane on we Indians. Vedas have mantras for uniting two people (of opposite gender) as husband and wife, but nowhere there are any mantras for divorce. Divorces are the product of ego and friction! Where there is love, there cannot be any desire to win, there always remains a desire to make the other person victorious! There is a lot of happiness in losing in the hands of your beloved! That boosts love!

If a wife has no permission to touch husband's wallet, if she cannot share her earnings with her husband, if they bring 'professionalism' in their private life - May I ask - "Why do they need to be husband and wife? Why can't they lead separate lives singly and individually? Is it just for satiating pleasures of flesh that they would want to depend on each other? If yes, then what's a big deal in such marriages?” Love is far superior than lust. Lust is just a part of life but love is the life itself! Lust without love doesn't need 'marriage' (a brothel visit would just be enough!). Lust that comes out of love keeps the couple happy and united forever.  Therefore in every aspect, inter-dependence is the indispensable key towards a successful, and happy married life for a householder.

Vedas have given so much of importance to mutual dependants of husband and wife that they have said the following mantras.

इहेमाविन्द्र सं नुद चक्रवाकेव दंपती | (Atharva Veda अथ् १४-२-६४)
[The elders pray for the couple:] "Join the couple here, Indra... they resemble the chakravaka and its mate.
(The chakravaka is a symbol for mutual devotion of the couple. if one loses its life, the mate will die in grief. Such should be the inter-dependants of husband and wife on each other).

Vedas blesses them to never part (no divorce). They expect them to remain happily together and see even their grand children.

इहैव स्तम् मा वि यौष्ठं
विश्वं आयुर् व्यश्नुतं
क्रीळन्तो पुत्रैर् नप्तृभिर्
मोदमानौ त्वे गृहे | (Rig Veda ऋग् १०-८५-४२)
[The lifelong union of the ideal couple as expressed by elders in their blessing:] "May you two dwell in this house, never parted, you enjoy the full life span as prescribed by vedas, may you have the fortune to play together with your sons and grandsons,"

There is another aaseervada mantram in Vedas, which is a gem in itself. This mantra states how much dependant a husband needs to be on wife for care and in turn how much essential a wife should become for her husband to provide her care.

दशास्याम् पुत्राणम् अन्ते पतिमेकादशम् कृधि
daśāsyām putrāṇam ante patimekādaśam kṛdhi
"You beget ten sons and make your husband the eleventh son".

Everyone knows that there is noone better than a mother in taking care of her children. She wakes up even at the sneeze of her child to see if he/she is alright. Such a kind of protection is sought for her husband also from her in above mantra. Also, it is indicative of old age as well. When old age dawns, a husband (being elder than the wife), becomes dull, stupified, and becomes an object of mockery from everyone including his children and grand-children. AT that time only recourse / refuge becomes his wife who stands by him always and protects him.

5. WIFE SHOULD BE THE QUEEN OF THE HOUSE, NOT A SLAVE

Unfortunately, today either between a husband and wife there exists either too much of independence or too much of domination. The right balance is missing. If wife and husband are both working, 'independence' is damaging the fabric of their marriage life; else, if the wife is a home maker, she is dominated and treated as a slave, and this again is ruining the marriage life totally. However, Vedas have given a balanced approach for a householder's life. While we have seen "inter-dependence" element in previous section, let's see the position given by Vedas to a wife in her in-laws home

The position given to woman as a wife in our culture was indeed very exalted. Below mantra from Rig veda clearly highlights that she is expected to be treated as the queen and the main spokesperson of that house. It should not be thought as if a bride needs to dictate her in-laws because she is called the queen of that house. Instead, we need to understand that she is being the queen's position in their hearts. A position in heart remains for posterity and that's what is the intended message, along with the outward message of giving prominent position in the home.

पूषा त्वेतो नयतु हस्तगृह्य
अश्विना त्वा प्र् वहतां रथेन
गृहान् गच्च गृहपत्नी यथासौ
वशिनी त्वम् विदथं आ वदासि | (Rig Veda ऋग् १०-७५-२६)
"The bride is entering the ritualistic location, her hand held by the god puushan (one form of the sun god) the twin gods of medicine the Ashwins are accompanying her in the chariot.. and she is going away from her house to that of her husband and she is blessed that she may become the ruler of the household and the main spoke-person of the assembly in her husbands place".

The bride is blessed to join the supreme place in the household. See how the father-in-law, mother-in-law and everyone is granting her the central place in their hearts.

सम्राजी श्वशुरे भव
सम्राजी श्वश्र्वां भव
ननान्दरि सम्राजी भव
सम्राही अधि देवृषु | (Rig Veda ऋग् १०-८५-४६ अथ १४-२-४४)
"May your father in law treat you with affection as if you were a queen. May your mother in law treat you with love as if you were a queen. May your sisters in law love and respect you as if you were a queen. May your brothers in law respect and adore you as if you were a queen"

6. WHAT SHOULD A HUSBAND AND WIFE WISH/PRAY FOR EACH OTHER

Again, Vedas have expressed beautifully the instructions for an ideal marriage life for a householder couple. A husband prays to god for perpetual unity of their hearts and conjugal unity as follows.

समञ्जन्तु विश्वे देवाह्
सं आपो हृदयानि नौ
सं मातरिश्वा सम् धाता
समुद्रेष्ट्री दधातु नौ | (Rig Veda ऋक् १०-८५-४७)
"May all Gods and all waters unite our hearts. Especially the gods Mathariswa, dhaata, and dheshtri, make us very close.

A wife prays for the longevity of their lifespan so that hey could live happily and united with each other. For thsi the bride prays to the gods and elders as follows:

दीर्घायुरस्तु मे पतिर् जीवाति शरदः शतम्। (Atharva Veda अथ् १४-२-६३)
"May my husband live long, and we will live together for hundred years...bless us"

7. CONCLUDING REMARKS

May all the Indians who have faith in Sanatana Dharma and the teaching of Vedas follow these instructions and remain always blissful in their conjugal life of Gruhasthashrama.

|| tathAstu || So Be It ||

3. What's the Abode of the Lord? (Category:- Philosophical)

We usually hear people saying,

Lord Shiva is Smashaan Vaasi (cremation ground) etc....etc...

Now a question arises, how can a person who resides in identifiable no. of places be a God/Supreme lord?

On the other hand, lord Shiva's 108 names (Astottara Sata namavali) calls him by a name "Om JagadVyapine Namah". Which hails him saying that he is the one who is All Pervading and Omnipresent, and is indeed spread across the universe and beyond!!

Contradictions in the scriptures of Hinduism. isn't it??
If you nodded your head as "yes", then you are mistaken! Let me explain how.

Let's analyse the matter a bit further. Let's first understand the definition of "Smashaan/Cremation ground".
Cremation ground is a place where dead bodies are burnt/burried. In simple words where bodies become one with the soil.
We have distinct creamation grounds for humans where we burn/bury the deceased people. That means all other places are pious/sacred/pure and not smashaana? Certainly Not!!

Where do we bury/burn dead bodies of birds,rats, ants, insects, bees, snakes, lizards and so on? We never do. they become one with the soil whichever place they fall dead on earth.
On similar lines, where do we bury/burn fishes, octopus, sharks, whales, and frogs etc kind of beings? Again there is no particular cremation ground for them. They all get burried wherever they fall dead (ocean).

So, now do you agree with the point that entire earth is a cremation ground (smashaana)? Doesn't that imply that Lord Shiva exists in every iota of Earth?

Now coming to Space. Our macrocosm is not inert. it contains many living particles. (Virus is a living particle which doesn't need atomosphere for its existence). Also, we have been witnessing UFO(s) and hence we believe that aliens DO exist outside the earth. Also we believe that any one who is born has a death for sure. So be it living particles/microbes/aliens everything dies even outside the earth. So even the cosmos is not an exception from becoming a Grave yard/Smashaana/Cremation ground. Isn't this correct?

Then doesn't the above analysis get us to a conclusion that entire universe is a smashaana and the one lord Shiva who resides in Smashaana actually pervades the entire universe?

So abode of God is not a single place. God is spread accross the cosmos, permeates through the minutest to mega objects and lives in every iota of space. God is everywhere!

P.S:-In order to explain the concept, i have used example of lord Shiva. Vishnu devotees, please note that Vishnu itself means "All Pervading"!!

Credits:-This explanation is written by me with the inspiration from the discource of Sri Chaganti Koteswara Rao on Bhakti TV in Maheswara vaibhavam programme. Idea belongs to him, words and explanation belongs to me.

4. Meaning of True Form and Avatara (Category:- Philosophical)

What is an 'Avatar'? If somebody asks this question, we end up giving synonyms like 'Manifestation, Incarnation' etc.
Sometimes we think "Why the God needs to take an Avatar and protect us? Can't the same thing be accomplished in his true form?". Let's analyse this a bit further as follows:

We all know and agree to the fact that GOD permeates everything, is all pervading, is omnipresent and entire universe is inside him. So, now answer the following questions.

• If i want to put a garland of beautiful lotus flowers around the neck of the God, will it be possible for me? certainly not. Since God is so vast that i can't measure his neck
• If i want to touch/hug God, will it be possible for me? Again the answer would be 'No' since he stands immeasurable and is not in a physical form
• if i want to perceive God with my earthly eyes (Charma Chakshu), will it be possible to bear his infinite aura (Teja)? No!

In such cases how can a common man (let's not talk about Yogis and Kundalini etc. here) show his/her devotion to the God then? Definitely God has to take some form and occupy limited space within the limits of human perception in order to let a common man know him, dwell in him, and reach him finally.

So, God has to take a form which is called 'Avatara' and come near us, become one of us, speak to us, feel our sentiments and all such humane qualities he needs to exhibit only for ourselves!

Meaning of Avatara:-

Let's try to understand the meaning of the word 'Avatar' first.

if you are a musician or a singer you would be acquainted with the Sthais (levels). There are 3 levels/octaves viz. Mandara, Madhyama, and Tara/Taraka. When someone sings in 3rd octave (Highest sthayi) we say, "He/She is singing in Tara Sthayi"!

So, Tara sthayi is something beyond. God in his true form remains in the Tara sthayi, means he is Durgama, not perceivable, not attainable, not discernible with normal/common human qualities.

Avatara=Ava+Tara, means opposite of Tara, which is attainable, perceivable, touchable, etc.

So, in order to come closer to us, God takes incarnations (Avatara) and protects us, loves us, plays with us, indulges in all worldly activities as like as we human beings do. (Otherwise it's not impossible for the lord to do the same in the true form).

It's all about the devotees, in order to protect them, to love them to become easily accessible to them he takes so many forms.

God is all pervading, and can come out from anywhere, the best example being "Narshimha Avatara". Lord Sri Hari didn't come when Prahalada was being punished. he didn't come when Hiranyakashyap's attrocities were at its peak. Lord Hari came out of the Pillar when Hiranyakashyap asked Prahalada the following questions:

Hiranyakashyap: "Where does your Hari live?

Prahalada: He is everywhere

Hiranyakashyap: he is everywhere? Is your Hari in this stone Pillar?

Prahalada: Yes, he is everywhere!

Then Hiranyakashyap breaks that pillar with his Gada (mace), and Lord Hari in the form of Narsimha (half man half Lion) comes out just to keep the word of the Devotee (Prahalada) and to keep his faith of "Hari is everywhere" undeterred.

God is Bhakta Vatsal, he always loves us (the children) and that's why comes in various Avataras and lives among us, plays with us, loves us, lives like us and what's not?

Credits: This explanation is written by me with the inspiration from the discourse of Sri Chaganti Koteswara rao on Bhakti TV in 'Venkateswara Vaibhavam' Episode. Idea belongs to him which i have tried to pen in my words.

5. Mysterious Dasavatara (Category:-Philosophical)

We all know that lord Sri Maha Vishnu incarnates and protects us whenever Dharma starts fading away. The great Geetacharya says the same as the following verse:-

Yada yada hi Dharmasya, Glanirbhavati bharata

Abyutthanama Adharmasya tadatmanam Srujamyaham

paritranaya Sadhunam Vinashaya Cha Dushkrutam

Dharma Sansthapanarthaya Sambhavami yuge yuge

Lord Vishnu has incarnated many times in many forms however, only 10 major incarnations have become famous and are called by the name 'Dasavataram'

The Dasavatara are as viz. Matsya, Kurma, Varaha, Narsimha, Vamana, Parashurama, Sri Rama, Sri krishna, Buddha and Kalki (who is yet to come).

If we analyse the incarnations we can observe that there is a striking similarity among the Avataras of Vishnu and the stages of Human life.

1. Matsya, Kurma, Varaha :-They resemble embryonic stages of human when he is inside the mother's womb. If we read Biological books and study the human life process chapter, we would see that an embryo passes through various stages of development and resembles the above mentioned creatures till it fully develops into an infant.
2. Narsimha :- This resembles the 'infant stage' where a baby knows only to cry aloud as like as a roaring lion and also to gobbles up milk from the mother's breast as like as the lord Narsimha drank the blood of Hiranyakashyap
3. Vamana :- This stage resembles closely with childhood
4. Parashurama :- This stage resembles closely with an IDeal student life. A life of a human where he remains in Brahmacharya Ashrama and leads a pious life of a student
5. Sri Rama :- This Avatara points us to the Adulthood, a stage of an Ideal Gruhast Ashrama where a man follows ideals of married life and remains faithful/devoted to only one Wife.
6. Sri Krishna :- This also resembles Adulthood and a life of a person in Gruhastha Ashrama, but it resembles that man who takes interest in romance and remains attached to many wives or ladies
7. Buddha :- This incarnation resembles Vanaprastha / Sanyasi Ashramas where a man devotes his time in learning and preecing and tries to reach god through meditation
8. Kalki :- This avatara represents the end of the human life cycle

This is the beauty of lord Vishnu's Avataras!!

11. Unleashing the Secrets Behind Reincarnation and Salvation (Category:- Hinduism)

NOTE:- THIS ARTICLE WAS WRITTEN YEARS BACK WITHIN THE LIMITS OF MY KNOWLEDGE OF THOSE DAYS. HENCE THIS ARTICLE HAS FEW ERRORS WHICH I HAVE NOT CORRECTED DUE TO LACK OF TIME NOWADAYS. READERS MAY KEEP THIS POINT IN MIND THAT SOME OF THE UNDERSTANDING GIVEN HERE MAY BE ERRONEOUS OR HALF-CORRECT POINTS. HENCE IGNORE SUCH POINTS. FOR INSTANCE, - I WROTE, "Moksham can be attained only in 2 places viz. Vaikuntha loka or kailasha Loka.", WHICH IS HALF-TRUTH BECAUSE MOKSHA ALSO HAS FLAVORS SUCH AS - JEEVANA-MUKTI (which si attained here and now in the same body), KRAMA-MUKTI (residing in satyaloka untill dissolution of universe), SAROOPYA ETC., MUKTIS (which are again similar to krama mukti in the sense that the jivas are believed to live in the abodes of Vishnu/Shiva in close proximity with their fav. god). WHILE READING, READERS ARE REQUESTED TO MAKE SUCH CORRECTIONS ON THEIR OWN AS APPROPRIATE. I HAVE NO PLANS TO EDIT/UPDATE THIS ARTICLE.

Here i want to post one dialogue between me and an Orkut friend of mine. In one post in a mythological community i posted the below text based on which he asked few questions. I tried to answer him with respect to Hindu scriptures.
It has been a common myth in almost all religions that attaining to Heaven is the prime objective of any human. But only Hinduism discusses something beyond the borders of Heavens!
Normally people would always have a notion that their aim is to stay in heaven forever and for that good deeds are the gateway. By the end of this article, you would come to know that one can never stay permanently in Swarga (heaven) and doing any kind of deeds (Karmas) would shackle you under bondage and wouldn't let you liberate.Difference between ascending to Swargam and attaining Moksham:In the very beginning slokas of Bhagwad Gita, lord Sri Krishna tells to Arjuna the following verse.

"Hatova Prapsasi Swargam...Jitvava Bhoksasi Mahih"

Meaning:- If you die fighting in a battle, you would attain to Heaven, if you win the battle you can rule the earth kingdom.

So, going to heaven is the ultimate end point since Geeta says so, isn't it? No!
The beauty of Gita is, it begins with the above sloka and ends with a sloka which shows the ultimate place of permanent bliss for any soul. It says,

"Aham twa sarva papebhyo Moksha ishyami ma Shuchah"It says, i'll free you from all your sins and give you liberation (Moksha)

So, let's discuss what's the basic difference between Swargam and Moksham.

People who do good deeds they go to Heaven. Heavens are also of various types for various deeds. You may call them as various 'Departments' within the master heaven. e.g., people who get killed in war they are given a special place in "Veera Swargam" as per our Hindu mythology.
But Moksham is something called as "Janma raahitya" a state where the cycle of birth and death ceases. It's a state of union of soul with the supreme soul.

Swarga loga is not a place of attaining Moksham. Moksham can be attained only in 2 places viz. Vaikuntha loka or kailasha Loka.

Whosoever goes to Swargam on account of his good deeds; after the bank balance of his good deeds finishes, he shall have to come back to mrityu loka (earth) again in some form or other.

Based on my above post, my friend asked me the following questions for which i clarified his doubts. Let me narrate entire discussion which went in the form of question and answer.

Aren't Swargam(heaven) and Narakam(hell) what we experience on the earth rather than some separate world?

What good and bad we experience on earth are just the Side effects of our virtues and vices respectively.

As per our Hindu scriptures, we do have a separate Swarga and Naraka where actual rewards/punishments are given. It's a common misconception that all our sufferings and happiness are due to our bad/good deeds and that's it we have got the rewards or punishments on earth itself. But that's not true. Let me explain why.

If say, some good deed (say, Anna Danam) has a reward of Punya which equals to staying in bliss for 150 days in Swarga. If one has to experience that bliss on earth itself, then his life time would not suffice since 150 days of Swarga >= 150 years on earth (time difference).
Similarly for a bad deed say, "Para Stree Vancha" there is a punishment of suffering 150 days of Naraka yatana. Then also if one thinks of accepting those sufferings on earth itself his life would not accommodate that punishment area. And still something would spill out as bank balance (good/bad whatever).

So, on earth, all our moments of bliss and sufferings are mere side effects of our deeds. Actual calculations would happen 'above' and accordingly one would experience Swarga sukhas and Naraka yatanas (for this, the soul would enter a separate body Yatana Deha.)

There are things like Prarabdha Karmas, Poorva Janma Vasanas, Sanchita Papam/Punyam etc. They are also major factors to decide our fate, current life, and life after death. Also there are some NISHIDDHA KARMAS as advocated by Vedas/Upanishads.

The Nishiddha karma is the prohibited karma which includes homicide, promiscuity(sleeping with a para stree) etc. And as saints say, even Prayaschitta of these Nishiddha karmas are very difficult then one can imagine what is the punishment for them. We see lot many people being unfaithful to their wives and indulging in adultery. But still we see them living a happy life without getting punished here on earth.
So does that imply they are forgiven? No! They are happy because of their sanchita punyas but they would be dealt with after their souls depart.

So, conclusion is, of course it is correct that we experience good and bad in earth itself. But they are simply the side effects of our good and bad deeds. Actual movie always remains "yet to be released" till death.

Simply if i have to say its like:- You get appreciation mails from your boss in office (they are side effects) but only once in a year u get a HIKE in salary that depends upon your overall performance (this is like Swargam), and if u get an escalation mail it's like side effects but when you get a low rating in yearly appraisals (based on your yearly poor performance), that is like Naraka.

How to attain Moksham (Liberation) then?

One can attain Moksha (liberation) only when he detaches himself from the Karmas (Deeds) and Karma phalas (Results).
Till the time one has some karma phala, he/she can't attain moksha since karma phala won't go unrewarded (good/bad)!!

So, we should always try to think to attain Salvation (Moksha/Mukti). For that, all you need to do is whatever karmas you do, disassociate yourself from that karma, and sacrifice the karma phala and donate it to your favorite supreme lord.

Do a karma phala samarpana by chanting the below sloka (taken from Vishnu Sahasranama Stotra), a good one:-

Kaayena Vaacha Manasendrierva,
Budhyatma Naava Prakrute Swabhavaat,
Karomi Yadyad sakalam parasmai,
*parameter*yeti samarpayami..Om Tat Sat!

Note:- Replace the parameter between *,* with Narayana/Sadashiva/Eswara as per your own preference. So it should read like "Narayanayeti or Sadashivayeti/Eshwarayeti/Bhavaniyeti/mahalakshmiyeti/Lalitayeti" etc......

Give away all your karmas and karma phalas to God. It's not you who are doing them It's he who is driving and you are a Nimitta Matra (an object/puppet). So the fruits of those karmas are also NOT yours. So let's SACRIFICE the karmas and their fruits by offering them to the Lord himself/herself. And then once our karma phala becomes ZERO (no punya no papam) easily we can attain Moksha.
Well there are other shortcuts/easy ways to attain Moskha even though one is sinful/virtuous but i would like to de-scope them from this thread for now.

Where do we experience these karma phalas? On the earth or at a different world?We would experience side effects on earth (which would keep on preparing the stage for our new prarabdha karmas) and results in heaven/hell

These cycle of births and deaths, does it have any limit or will it continue till all the karmas are nullified? People say one has 7 births totally, is it true?

There are 84 crores of species. But that doesn't mean one has to take 84 crores of births in all those Yonis and then only liberation would occur. Nor is the case as it's questioned stating that there are only 7 births. One can get liberation in any birth by various means, viz. accidentally (e.g->by dying on Kaarteeka month's Monday,or ksheerabdi dwadasi day), Chanting Hari/Hara name while leaving his body (this is sure shot to give Moksha even if he is a Maha Paapi), self knowledge (Kundalini sadhana and realization after Sahasrara Chakra penetration), Nishkaama karma and karma phala samarpana (results in zero bank balance). So what i want to say is, one can attain liberation in one Janma itself or one can keep continuing in the vicious cycle even for crores of births

During shraadha we give pindam or the rites to three generations above us. People say that the reason for this is those before them are believed to be born again. But according to the aforementioned calculation, say if one has the karmas worth staying for 300-400 days stay in swarga or naraka, they wud not have been born (as those many days are equal to as many years on the earth). Is this correct?

Good question, the same question was asked by someone on phone in a programme called "DHARMA SANDEHALU" telecasted on Saptagiri channel(Telugu DD channel). There a saint from Sringeri came and explained it like this-->"Ancestors of our past 3 generations say, were eligible to stay in pitru lokas and enjoy for say 500 years, then it's most likely that atleast 3 generations are still in that loka only. Since our 1 year=1 day in pitruloka so we are offering daily meal to them. And it's not necessary that our child would be the same soul of those 3 generations since their stay period there still wouldn't get over and our life would get terminated due to time difference. So, in a long run in some 5,6,7 generation if at all god destines them to be born in the same dynasty, they'll take birth. Otherwise it's not necessary that people of one clan would again be born in the same. They may be born as even another animal in fact

The effect of sanchita karma is what we experience in this birth because of our deeds in the previous births and the effect of Prarabdha karma is which we'll experience in the next birth. So this states that we experience the fruit of all karmas in the earth rather than somewhere, which is contradicting your own points stated above. How would you resolve this contradiction?

Our yester-life's actions decide how we are born today. Our present actions would set stage for our future. But we experience all the side effects and won't get actual rewards/punishments here. I made a point about "vasanas" which i didn't elaborate there. That comes into picture here to explain the query clearly. Sometimes a mother says, "my child feels repulsive to garlic, he won't eat that". How did that detest come? Mother didn't teach him that. It was something on which he had won over his sense of taste in previous births. So now he is a conqueror. Someone singing or dancing or doing any art without much effort is because of the person's mastery over that art in the previous birth. But in another case, one may see a guy who would like company of girls even from childhood. How did that come? That's a vasana which he failed to conquer in his previous births and which has come to him in this life also. So, these Vasanas also determine one's life. Even if a person's virtues are rewarded fully in other lokas then also since he had some vasanas which he didn't conquer , he has to come back to earth. Similarly, with punishment in hell also doesn't make a person liberated. Till the time vasanas exist they would come back to life, and again they would do some karmas and hence the cycle would continue. That's why saints keep on stressing to acquire self knowledge. Self knowledge erases all vasanas. And then with karma phala tyaga one can become a big ZERO indeed. Subsequently resulting into oneness in the supreme

That was a good explanation about the vaasanas. I heard that Someone singing or dancing or doing any art without much effort is because of the person's mastery over that art in the previous birth. But how does this justify in this case, say someone is so good yet he is suffering, like he gets unusual diseases or gets paralysed etc. Do u have any explanations for this?

If i understood the query correctly, you asked why do people who are born talented like dancers etc. or people who are good at heart are still sometimes born poor or having diseases. right?

Answer is:- That's the 'Trial Period'!!
After giving Yatanas in hell, when god has to put him back on earth, would god like to give him a lavish life just because he has had his punishment? No. God would like to put him in trial again and this time learn good things and reach him properly as a Sampoorna Gyani. But as per some texts, everyone in embryo stage remembers his past and pleads to god saying he would not repeat the things done and would always be righteous. But as soon as he comes out of the womb, due to "Maya/Illusion" he forgets everything and again falls into the same pit. Only a person who has got sat-sangati (good companionship) would tend to incline towards god as well as Dharma and if he is lucky enough to get on to the right path (may be a good guru's guidance), he would set himself towards god's desired way and reach salvation.

Trials are synonymous to what i referred to as 'side effects'.

Does a person have only 7 births or he continues the cycle of births and deaths till he nullifies the effect of all his karmas? We say tat He (God) controls everything. So if we do err somewhere isn't it tat he wanted us to err? Are we responsible for our actions (good/bad) or is He responsible for them? If He is responsible for them, how can we say tat we have sinned or done a good deed? Or is it that the above theory is applicable for only those who surrender all their karmas to Him & not those who surrender the sins alone? Pls enlighten

This is a bit controversial question. There are 2 schools of thoughts which believe in the below two ways viz. from Advaita (Non dualism) perspective and from Dvaita (Dualism) perspective

Advaita way (Non-Dualism):-
"Om Eesana ssarva vidyanam Eswarah Sarva bhutanam..!!"

What is the difference between God and Us? The above sloka's 2nd part says, "Eshwara is himself present in every beings (be it micro organisms like algae or macro organisms like whale or dinosaur)"
We are that Shiva swaroopas only and nothing else. Jeeva is actually Shiva who has covered himself under the cloth of Maya and acts as an ignorant person. It's basically a divine sport. A leela of the supreme being. he himself transforms as humans/creatures, himself remains under illusion and himself finds out a way to get disillusioned and himself gets merged into himself and says he has given moksha to his jeeva form. It's all a single divine game and nothing else. People who awakens their kundalini and become enlightened they realize that they are none other than Siva, and there is nothing else present in this universe except Siva "Sarvam Sivamayam Jagat". He, the human gets to know that he has become the supreme brahman.

Now coming to your query:- There is a saying "Without Eshwara sankalpam even a grass blade can't move". It tells us that every act what we do is actually "persuaded" and also actually "done" by eswarah himself. We all are nimitta matra (just objects/puppets) in his divine sport. Yes neither our good deeds nor our bad deeds are actually ours. Similarly the corresponding rewards/punishments are also actually being experienced by the lord himself. Being under Maya we think we are pained with punishments and pleasured with rewards.

It's he who is "Karta, Karma and Kriya" also. We are just his projections/images. But in this case also if we get a little enlightenment, we should try to stay aloof from wrong things and should try to do good to the world and knowingly we should sacrifice all our karmas to the lord. Of course without eshwara anugraham no one can even get inclined to faith in divinity. So, here we should not make a mistake of doing bad deeds deliberately and saying eshwarah is doing that. No! Who are we? We are Eshwara under illusion. So can eshwara do any bad deed? No! So, we should try to avoid doing bad things even if we get provoked to do. Everyone should follow the way scriptures/dharma asks us to live. That way eshwaranugraham would be there and we'll get out of illusion and then we'll be equal to eshwara and will merge in our actual form itself. As i said, it's all his "divine sport" so. It's he who uplifts people and makes free from illusion and makes them attain salvation. And again it's he himself who remains in the everlasting birth-death cycles taking innumerous janmas and doing karmas. But people who are blessed with even an iota of faith in god, that faith is actually god's gift/desire and god wants us to realize our true self and come back to attain oneness into the actual form. So, we should utilize that chance and show interest in him with total surrender and Bhakti. Then Eshwara would make us disillusioned and would make us one with him.

In Ashta Vakra Geeta, sage Ashtavakra explains to Janaka that, "Whatever pain or pleasure we experience is not actually ours. We should remain as a witness/spectator of all such happenings"

Dwaita way (Dualism):-
God and we both are two different entities. Even gods are many (Shiva/Vishnu etc) who play different roles. We are the doers of virtues and vices and we are accordingly pleasured/punished. We need to overcome illusion and understand that we have to reach the supreme being and hence we need to sacrifice all our karmas and phalas to him and remain in zero state.
N.B:- When you said "He controls everything..." u are actually pointing at Advaita!!

Conclusion:- Advaita is an advanced conceptual ocean and only Gyanis can fully understand that. So, safest way is to keep Advaita in our viewpoint when we look at God, but think like Dwaita and keep a check on yourself and avoid doing bad deeds. Finally surrender yourself to God and give up all your karmas to him along with the Phalas/Results.

Krishna says, "Sarva Dharmani Parityajya..Mamekam Saranam Vraja..Aham Twa Sarva Papebhyo Moksha Ishyami Ma Shuchah"

13. Saakaar Vs. Nirakaar Bhakti-Which is Correct? (Category:Hinduism)

Recently in a Forum a person raised question on the correctness of Saakaar and Nirakaar forms of God. He asked which kind of Bhakti is correct. Not only i faced this question there, but it has been a common and constantly nagging question available in multitudes all over the internet.

Before writing my explanation let me take the chance to define the aforementioned terms so that those who are new to these words can at least have a ground before reading the explanation further.

Devotion/Bhakti is primarily of two categories, viz. Saakaar form of Bhakti and Nirakaar form of Bhakti.

1. Saakaar Bhakti:- This is a phenomenon where a devotee sees/realizes the Supreme being (God) in the form of an idol, picture, or religious symbols (like Shiva Lingam). In this type of Devotion he holds a figure as his beloved deity
2. Nirakaar Bhakti:- This is a phenomenon where a devotee is gifted with such a discerning eye that he realizes the Supreme everywhere in physical, or mental plane. These people consider God as formless
   

Now let's get onto the next part, i.e., explanation.

Here is the explanation what i posted in that forum to explain the subtle difference between those two forms of Bhakti :

'Saakaar' and 'Nirakaar' - Both paths are correct!

Reason:- It's true that God is beyond the discrimination of Forms or Gender. But unless a person is installed in Bhakti of Saakaar form he can never become firm in Nirakaar form. Imagination is highly important to converge our focus/concentration.

For instance, If i say some random meaningless word, "kambalotaparbahuta" and tell you that he is the Supreme god and we can attain Moksha only by praying to that deity. One may not be able to focus on it since one can't imagine a figure to focus (Imagination is a prerequisite for focus).

Now. If i add a little more spice to it and say "He has a human form but has four hands 2 wings of eagle, holds a Machine Gun (which is his divine weapon/Astra), rides on a dinosour (his Superior Vehicle) and protects the whole world with his grace, and he is very merciful"

Then, with this imagination if i draw that figure, and give it to someone and say worship him daily. Believe me, automatically one will be able to focus and concentrate on that figure for quite some days till one feels that he/she is perfect in his/her Bhakti.

Next, if one is asked to try to meditate upon the same figure in ones inner self (Bhroomadhya Chakra) one will be able to concentrate on ones bhroomadhya chakra properly. And then by and by one would become a master in Nirakaar bhakti.

The sum and substance is, barring extraordinary Saints or 'Kaaran-Janma' humans, normal humans can't focus their bhakti on Nirakaar form so easily (because sense/mind/mann is chanchal/unstable).

Hence Saakaar form of worship is a stepping stone/prerequisite to Nirakar form of Bhakti.

15. Trimata Aarati Pradakshina Stotram (Category:- Poetry)

I have moved my poetry to a separate blog altogether in order to give them a distinct place to flourish. This particular post has been moved to the following location.

http://stotramaalika.blogspot.com/2010/06/trimata-aarati-pradakshina-stotram.html

Thanks for visiting!

18. Dwadasakshari Veerabrahmendra Jeevana Charitra Stotram (Category:- Poetry)

I have moved my poetry to a separate blog altogether in order to give them a distinct place to flourish. This particular post has been moved to the following location.

http://stotramaalika.blogspot.com/2011/01/dwadasakshari-veerabrahmendra-jeevana.html

Thanks for visiting!